Try Another Perspective Can`t you see how wrong you are about my mother? an angry wife used to say ."she`s been a saint to us ,yet you make her out to be a demon ." "How can you say that ?" her husband would answer."Anybody with an ounce of intelligence could see what a pain your mother is ." This argument illustrates how some people spend their marriages struggling to change a spouse`s mind .People in enduring marriages begin with the premise that there are many realities. they learn to accept different points of view. When this couple broke free of their one-reality trap, their problems were solved," My mother is a loving,caring,pain in the neek," the wife now admitted. As another husband said of his wife ,“She`s my eye-opener.she sees what i never could,I do the same for her,We make a marital point of view between the two of us that is totally different from either one of us." The lasting marriage is never sure of the separate "selves"that make it up.But it has complete confidence that the relationship will grow in a never-ending process of learning. |